Losing a job is primarily associated with failure in India, which may not be entirely true in today's context. Our article titled "Changing Times" shows how today terminations, layoffs and downsizing have become almost  a norm as companies continuously adjust to survive. Where once "being fired" was reserved for the under-achievers, it has now become a situation that most employees find themselves in at least once during their professional career. 

The first few days following the loss of a job are often confusing, and uncertain. For an individual the reality that a job no longer exists can be a difficult thing to accept; they feel their entire world is crumbling down around them. Their plans no longer seem to hold true, they seem to have lost control over their life. During this time, people may withdraw from friends, family and former co-workers. They may feel embarrassed, ashamed, or guilty. They may also refuse to discuss anything about their feelings. 

Emotions like panic, fear, anger, denial, sadness, depression are natural reactions for anyone facing a major life change and these follow after a person loses a job. It is important to know that going through these feelings is a necessary healing process that will eventually bring about new opportunities for growth and change. They need to allow time and space to feel emotions that accompany the loss instead of trying to fight it, or pretending it doesn't exist. 

It is important for people to understand stages that they might go through as they cope with a job loss. It will help the person to progress and move from one stage to another instead of getting stuck at a particular stage. Proper understanding and a good support system usually are sufficient for most people to successfully go through their grief. A person who has been laid off may experience four basic stages of grief. The duration and intensity for each stage may vary for each individual. 

Stage 1 

When a person initially learns that their service is no longer required by the company the first response is one of shock. A certain kind of numbness where they cannot believe it is true. They may not fully understand the impact of what has happened. Sometimes they may become convinced that there must surely be some mistake and the decision will soon be reversed. 

A person was asked to leave since the company was changing its focus, this person refused to accept the fact that the company genuinely did not require a person with his skills. For about a week he used to constantly meet people from the human resources department and other managerial heads to ask to be given another chance. 

Stage 2 

After the person comes to the realization that they have actually lost their job, they feel fearful and anxious about the situation. These feelings arise from insecurity about the future and practical issues like finances etc. Later on at this stage the person starts experiencing anger. The person feels resentful and blames others. These feelings may be directed towards former employers, management, competition, and perhaps even family and friends. 

In another case this person who was laid off felt he was certainly better than some of his colleagues who had not been asked to leave. He felt resentful towards his colleagues and felt that the company had not been fair by asking him to leave. He was convinced his line manager's decision had been a biased one. 

Stage 3 

As time passes and it becomes increasingly obvious that they have lost their job, they realize more fully what has happened. Anger turns inwards leading to depression. Feelings of worthlessness, poor self-image, withdrawal, and extreme sadness emerge. Even if they didn't like their job, they may still miss the people, the routine, etc. The depression may be severe enough to inhibit normal functioning. The person cannot seem to get on with life. At this stage they procrastinate about trying to find another job, partly out of fear of failure and partly out of embarrassment from being jobless 

In one case a person had lost her job but initially took the fact really boldly. However, as a few weeks passed she started withdrawing. The self-confidence that initially seemed to hold her disappeared. She no longer wanted to see her friends or colleagues who had been really close. She spent a lot of time either alone closed up in her room or sleeping. Her health deteriorated and she became listless. 
 
Stage 4 

At this stage the person comes to terms with the loss. They realize that in order to possibly return to the quality of life they had before, they must make some changes in their life. They focus on the future and its possibilities. They begin to plan and act based on the plan. They develop a support network, which includes family, friends, mentors, and job contacts. This helps them avoid depression when they become discouraged. They keep trying, exploring alternatives, and building networks. 

A young person who lost his fist job spent quite a considerable amount of time just sitting at home. He could not come to terms with the fact that he had been laid off. He had been one of the few people who had got a prized campus placement. Slowly he got himself out of this stupor. He went back to his college and circulated his bio data to his professors, he contacted his classmates working in various companies and really networked in a very determined manner going all out to meet people. Within two months of his efforts he had received three offers to choose from. 

Ultimately the loss of a job is a complex life event, impacting one's thoughts, behavior, and feelings. How any one individual comes through it depends on his social network, financial responsibilities, past coping mechanisms, and personality. We must remember that though there is no quick fix solution, there is hope and with the right attitude and support people can definitely come through the situation. Sometime if emotions at a certain stage are not handled properly it can leave a person feeling worse off than before. Counselling is an important support tool that can be useful in helping people deal with each stage of their grief and help set the tone for recovery from this life situation. 

If you would like to discuss this further or need some help or support in this or any other area, our counsellors would be happy to help. 
 
Online Counselling 
Place an online request for an Appointment 

Call 1800-258-8999 / 1800-258-8121