Certain ways in which people are helped to overcome sexual problems: 

1. Being given ‘permission' to talk about the subject. 

2. Accurate information. 

3. Specific Suggestions. 

4. Intensive Therapy. 

Permission to talk 

It is common for us to bottle up our concerns because we believe it is wrong or unacceptable to talk about sex. As a result, we may not get the help or understanding that we need. It is important to be able to find someone with who we can share our doubts or concerns that may come up and express the difficulties being faced. This could be a mature, trusted family member or friend, a doctor, or a counsellor. In case it is related to one's sexual orientation, there is often the fear of being judged - since there are a lot of prejudices around this issue it is important to choose your confidant carefully. 

Accurate Information 

In this age of information overload, with the wide availability of books and information on the Internet, it may seem strange to say that more information is required. However, much of the information that is available is inaccurate and not factual, and it can be difficult to filter out the authentic information. One way is to make sure that you are searching through sites that are genuine - for example, medical sites. There are also good books written by doctors - ones that we would recommend are Everywoman and Everyman by Llewellyn Jones. Ignorance or misinformation is the cause of many difficulties, and often there are fears of being ‘abnormal' based on what we read about in the media or watch on the internet. 

Specific Suggestions 

Many distressing sexual problems can be greatly helped by simple changes in sexual routine or position. Books, medical advice, conversations with friends or/and counselling may all help you find these suggestions. At times problems could be caused by stress, fatigue, or a medical problem, and just knowing this could bring a certain amount of relief and a greater sense of control. 

Intensive Therapy 

In case the problem is more persistent, it may be necessary to meet a specialist. A good urologist or gynaecologist may be able to help you or if not, put you in touch with a sex therapist. Most of us feel rather uncomfortable, embarrassed, and anxious to approach a specialist for help. But it is important to approach this as you would any other medical problem, especially if it is causing a lot of worries or impacting an important relationship. 

Keep it in perspective 

Finally, it is important to remember that while our sexuality and sexual orientation are important parts of our lives, they are not the only important aspects of our lives. While we should take necessary steps to deal with concerns in this area, we should not let them overshadow other important aspects of our relationships, work, and personal lives that are going well. 

If you would like to discuss this further or need some help or support in this or any other area, our counsellors would be happy to help.