Just like adults, children experience jealousy too. Most parents either give in to their children and some even end up shaming their children when they feel jealous. At the end of the day, as a parent, you might be either conveying to your child that it is either okay to get jealous while you are comforting them and giving in to their demands. Or you are not allowing your child to feel an emotion that is only natural. 
 
So what does one do then? Let us start by understand why children get jealous: 
• New member in the family 
• A sick person who needs constant care and attention 
• Sibling Rivalry 
• Competition among peers (A peer getting better grades, having better toys or even being a lot more popular among friends and teachers) 

There can be other reasons as well 
 
Dealing with your child's jealousy 
 
Understand the Reason: Is there a message that your child is trying to send you? Children at times experience difficulty is expressing how they feel, that is why most children act out. Perhaps, by getting jealous, he/she is probably trying to tell you that you may not be spending enough time with them. Or that you do not appreciate them or value them in the way they want you to. 
 
Pay Attention: As a parent, you have tons of things to do in a day - taking care of the house, the kids, your spouse, as well as your career. You may think that you are spending enough time with your child and paying attention to their homework and other extra-curricular ivities, but children require different kinds of attention. Pay attention to the other things as well and do not dismiss it as unimportant as it may be very important to your child. 
Listening to their chatter and playing causally with them could also be a stress buster for you as well. 
 
Appreciate your Child: Most parents might under-appreciate or over-appreciate their children. Finding the balance can prove to be a little tough at first, as you do not want to over-do it nor do you want to come across as stingy with your appreciation. Find out what is important to your child, encourage them and look at appreciation when necessary. It also helps to get your child comfortable with feedback as it will not only help them to be open and grow, it will also take them a long way when they are adults. 
 
Encourage your Child to Appreciate Others: Try not to compare your child to someone else. Appreciate the other child and appreciate your child as well. By doing so, it will help your child be happy for others and it will also help them build friendships, where in they can learn from each other and grow. 

Do not punish your child: By punishing your child, you are sending out a message to your child that feeling jealous is not okay. In turn whenever they experience jealousy, it may come along with shame and guilt because they have been taught that feeling jealous is a bad thing. This will affect them when they grow up into adults when it comes to self-esteem and relationships with others around them. Instead encourage them to deal with jealousy in a positive manner. 
 
Give jealousy a Positive Spin: It is only natural to feel jealousy. Instead of stopping your child from feeling an emotion which is common, look at helping them express it in a positive manner. If there is a child that is much better in studies, see what that child is doing differently than them and encourage him/her to study better. When children envy others toys, it helps to get them to volunteer their things or their time to the underprivileged, so that they can be more grateful for what they have. In case, you cannot afford a particular toy or gadget at the moment, encourage your child to save up for it. 

As a parent, you may be trying all that you can to raise your children so that they can grow up to be good human beings. Pay attention to them in a manner that they consider important; maybe watching a TV cartoon or you listening to a new rhyme they learnt is important. You may not be able to do so all the time, but that is okay. You are doing the best you can. 
 
Remember that you are learning too, so while you are at it, make parenting a fun experience not only for yourself but your child as well. 

If you would like to discuss this further or need some help or support in this or any other area, our counsellors would be happy to help. 
 
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